I’m not a sad person. I’m oddly optimistic about many things. At least I think so. That’s why I was shocked that in the midst of yet another incredible craft beer-centric night that I was feeling down. Like high school emo and for no reason whatsoever all I want to do is listen to Dashboard down.
Last weekend I took a yearly roadtrip with some friends up to Rehoboth Beach. We had lunch at Franklins Brewery in Hyattsville, hit up 16 Mile in God knows where Delaware then made our way to Rehoboth for a bottleshare and dinner at Dogfish Head.
Maybe an hour into our night at Dogfish I turned to Doug and stated something to the effect of, “Man, is this it? Is this what this whole beer blogging thing is? Have we reached the top?” I clarified that I know there are many, many, many, many more levels of “beer greatness” (ex: just chilling with Garrett Oliver, brewing with monks) out there but at that moment have I reached the attainable top?
I’m not complaining, not in the slightest. It was one of the best nights/weekends I’ve had in a long time. I am fortunate to live a comfortable life full of best night-worthy events but this one was special. After thinking about it though, I was pretty down. A World Wide Stout and countless random 2oz pours of barleywines helped move my sorrows along quickly yet over a week later it still lingers in the back of my mind.
For what it’s worth at the moment I’m on my third 10%+ porter of the night and my beer-writing muscle has atrophied a bit so I have no idea if this makes any sense to anyone but me and maybe Doug.
For the effort I put into beer and beer blogging and learning about beer, I don’t think my “beer life” could get any better. Seriously. I love the friends I’ve made. I enjoy writing a post here every few weeks. I love the respect for beer that I have. I don’t want to take beer more seriously in terms of a profession for the foreseeable future. What the heck else can I ask for? It’s like things are so good that it’s sad the journey is over and you know there is more to the journey but you don’t have the willpower/time/want at this moment to take the next step down the path.
Maybe it’s a bit of craft beer depression. I don’t know. I don’t know what my next step will be. And I think that’s okay. I’ll just take it glass by glass, bottle by bottle, step by step.
***UPDATE 01.28.15!!***
I think I found the next step of my journey which will hopefully break me out of my little funk. I’m going to start working on a second season of Conversations with Beer Bloggers.
More on that in the coming weeks. Woo!! Let me know who you want to see on Season 2!
Recommended Reading:
Short On Beer 
If it helps, that is how I usually feel right before a creative breakthrough. Always darkest right before dawn, as they say. Cheers to ya!
Thanks, Chris! Got my fingers crossed for an impromptu creative breakthrough.
I could make a joke about the fact that if you were sitting at the DFH Pub then yes, you had reached the top. But that wouldn’t jive with my belief that DFH is not the be all end all of craft beer in Delaware.
I think Oliver and I talked about how everyone gets the “blahs” now and then. Hopefully something will come along soon and knock you out of it.
It’s not a “blah” or anything like that. I’m happy with where I am — just disappointed that I know the current and near future of my “great beer journey.” I was actually talking to Oliver earlier today trying to re-explain myself.
**Warning: Lord of the Rings spoiler**
I feel like how Frodo might feel at the end of the last Lord of the Rings if he stayed in the Shire instead of going off on more adventures. I’m sure he’d be happy with the Shire but knowing that there isn’t another unknown, unexpected adventure coming up would probably bring him down a bit.
Ah got it. Nothing out of the ordinary in the foreseeable future. The good thing is that you can control that to some extent.
I’m sure 6 months ago that Oliver wasn’t expecting in embark on a quest to build a beer from scratch. Keep looking. It will pop up sooner or later I’m sure.
Why is it a depression? Are you sure it’s not nirvana? Isn’t the point of many deep wisdoms to help people find happiness, satisfaction, and peace with where they are at?
The feeling you describe sounds amazing: “I love the friends I’ve made. I enjoy writing a post here every few weeks. I love the respect for beer that I have. I don’t want to take beer more seriously in terms of a profession for the foreseeable future. What the heck else can I ask for? It’s like things are so good that it’s sad the journey is over and you know there is more to the journey but you don’t have the willpower/time/want at this moment to take the next step down the path.”
My depression isn’t over where I am (my friends, experiences, all that). All that stuff is great. You could even call it nirvana. My depression is because the journey to get there is over and there are no more foreseeable journeys in the future. IDK. Maybe I’m just whining over nothing.
Thanks for the comment.